SXSW: You Won’t See Me There This Year

For the first time in 8 years, I will not be in Austin for  SXSW.  Three reasons:

  1. Too many hipsters.  I probably don’t need to explain this any further, but I’m just tired of skinny, smelly, greasy haired, white belt wearing hipsters. Maybe it’s because I had to hang around these assholes for so long for my last job, but I just can’t take them anymore.
  2. I don’t wait in line.  When I lived in Texas, I would get a Music or Platinum badge.  And for a long time (before I even started going) only the industry people (who could expense it) had badges.  But in the last few years, everyone else started to catch on: if you get a badge, you don’t have to wait in line with the losers who only have a wristband.  Not the case anymore.  Even if you have a badge, you have to wait in line for the good venues and good bands.  Fuuuck that.  Last year, I didn’t even get a badge or wristband and I saw plenty of music by going to the parties and “non-SXSW’ venues.
  3. Too many hipsters.  Again, why pay money to put up with their bullshit?

Now, I should say this: I would go to SXSW Film and/or Interactive.  I’ve seen a lot of great films at SXSW.  Bush’s Brain and a documentary about Billy Joe Shaver come to mind.  And I think I know enough about interactive to understand what the hell they’re talking about now, so I would go to that.  But not Music.  No way.

If you are going, here are my tips:

  • Some way, some how – get a pass to the SPIN party.  They usually have it at Stubb’s and the beer is free.
  • Even more important: Get a pass to the VICE Kills Austin party on Saturday Night.  Starts late, goes late.  It got shut down last yeat because some guys were fell off the top of the building where the band was playing.
  • Eat at Moonshine.  It’s right by the Convention Center and for some reason, it’s never overly crowded.  The food is awesome.
  • Screw 6th Street and go south on Congress and go to the Broken Spoke.  Cheap beer, old school country music and great people watching.
  • Say “hi” to Curt for me.